Returning to God: Overcoming Emotional Drift

Life hasn’t been easy recently. It seems to be one thing after another, but emotionally it feels like it’s all happening at once. There’s not been time to process one thing before the next has hit, and it’s all piling up. No wonder we’re often burning out and breaking down. The worst of it is we feel like we’re doing the right things. We’re spending time with God in prayer, reading our Bibles, and going to church. Doing all the things we usually do to help us process, whether that’s journalling or something else. But it’s not going away.

We open Scripture with the hope of finding answers, but nothing seems to help in the moment. It almost feels pointless and a waste of time. We know this isn’t good, but we don’t know what to do about it. At this point, we’ve prayed and cried more than we care to admit and still feel no further forward; nothing has changed. We still feel the heavy weight of our seemingly unprocessed feelings pushing down on us. But what if that’s the problem? What if we have begun to trust more in our feelings than in God and His Word? And the longer we continue the way we have been, we’re actually just drifting further away from God.

At what point did we start trusting our feelings more than God? How do we change that? But also, how can we know for sure that this is what’s happened to us?

When did the drift start?

Walking with God requires us to trust Him, but a lot of the time it’s not easy. Life isn’t easy; it’s like a rollercoaster with ups and downs. Actually, it’s more like a maze that’s a real-life version of Snakes and Ladders. We choose a direction and end up down the snake back where we started right when we thought we were about to finish, or we take a shortcut to success that leads us walking into a wall. The highs are still good, and the lows still suck, but with God, it can feel more intense.

I say this because when we follow God, we expect to experience suffering and trials. After all, that’s what His Word says (Romans 8:17). We expect it because Jesus suffered for us and we’re to become more like Him (1 Peter 2:21; 4:12-13), which would involve facing some of the things he experienced. We suffer because of sin and because satan, the devil and the enemy of all who believe in Jesus hate us and want to hurt us (John 15:18-20, 1 Peter 5:8). But also because we grow in suffering and discomfort; that is how God refines us (1 Peter 1:6-7).

On the flip side, the highs are amazing because God loves us and wants the best for us (Romans 8:28, John 3:16). We can expect good things because Jesus died and took the punishment for our sin so we can live a full life and that means good as well as bad (John 10:10). We are co-heirs with Christ because his blood took the place of ours and we share in his glory as well as his suffering (Romans 8:17).

“Now if we are children, then we are heirs – heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.” Romans 8:17

With this in mind and from our own experience, we know how strong our feelings are and the potential they have. Our feelings can cause us to act impulsively, and sometimes we don’t even understand why we feel the way we do. It does make sense that our feelings could cause us to drift from God, particularly negative feelings like anger or loneliness.

But why does this happen? Why do our emotions sometimes cause us to distance ourselves from God?

Answer me this: are you the type of person who, when you’re sad, will listen to sad songs? Does it help you feel better? For some, it does; it helps them process and move on. But sometimes it does the opposite, and afterwards you feel worse; the feeling of loneliness and despair increases.

We think the sad music will help us, when in fact it does the opposite; it’s an attempt to control. When we want control, emotions become our guide. It just doesn’t always work.

Emotions are an immediate response; we feel them instantly. Even if we want to hear God in the midst of powerful feelings, it can feel like He isn’t there or not speaking to us, so we turn away without realising that He was there the whole time. Our feelings had just overpowered everything. When this happens, it can lead to praying less often because we feel like we aren’t being heard, and in the process, our feelings replace God because they’ve become more reliable or at least that’s how we feel. Instead of trusting God, we begin trusting in our feelings, and it’s a vicious downward spiral from one moment to being distant from God.

Has the drift actually happened?

But how can we know for sure this has happened to us? How do we know we’re not overthinking? The answer is discernment.

Discernment is the ability to recognise the truth among lies, wisdom from impulse and what is actually good from what only feels good. It’s often described as the Holy Spirit helping us see with clarity. It’s the practice of aligning perception with truth rather than emotion.

What this means is we must look beyond our feelings to see what is happening underneath to get to the root of the issue. We must be able to see clearly to discern the truth of whether we are drifting from God.

With discernment, we can discover if our feelings have become an idol in our lives, or if for a brief moment we’ve just been overdramatic and are not drifting from Him.

Discernment can show up in different ways. It can show up as a feeling that something isn’t quite right, that just won’t leave, no matter how appealing it may seem. It can be recognising the volume of our feelings and realising they may be loud but not completely true. Or a moment of pause before action where our inner voice says, “Is this wise? Is this true? Is this loving?” It could simply be distinguishing between what we desire and what is beneficial.

We don’t always realise when discernment shows up, and sometimes we deliberately ignore it. If that is the case, it’s a good sign that something has to change because it could be that if we ignore discernment, we have become too focused on our feelings.

So what are some ways that could tell us this has happened?

When feelings dictate decisions more than prayer.
When peace is replaced by urgency, anxiety, or self-protection.
When God’s voice feels distant but emotions are dominant.
When we justify choices based on what we feel rather than what is true.

If all this is true, we have definitely begun drifting from God, and maybe the distance is more considerable than we think. But just because it’s happened does not mean all is lost. There is still hope, and God is waiting for us to return to Him.

How do I return to trusting God first?

How do we change? How can we restore our relationship with God? What does healing from this look like?

We begin by acknowledging the truth that we have drifted from God, intentionally or not. Ultimately, it was our feelings and actions that led to this point, and so it will be our feelings and actions that can lead us back to God. God wants us to have a relationship with Him. He waits for us to come back, and He even reaches out, but if we don’t respond or do anything about it, then it’s our own fault for the distance we’ve created.

It’s up to us to come to God and ask Him to forgive us. We need to confess our sin and vow to repent, to turn away from it and do what is good, pleasing, and right in God’s eyes. This is how we return to God, with honesty and humility. This is how we begin restoring our relationship with Him. Only God can give the healing we need; it’s only God who can tell us what we need to change in order to be restored.

We can spend all day every day in His presence, but until we confess and repent of our sins, the distance between God and us will continue to grow.

“Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.” Acts 3:19

Confession and repentance are how we begin restoring our relationship with God. What else can we do?

We can pray (1 Thessalonians 5:17). By being honest and sincere with God, by simply spending time with Him, we can rebuild our relationship on a stronger foundation. We can make sure we listen to Him and follow His commands (Psalm 119:105, John 14:15). Matthew 6:14-15 says that if we do not forgive others, God will not forgive us. So we need to forgive and let go of any grudges. But most of all, we must worship God (Romans 12:1). We must show our love with our hearts and our words.

This is how we restore our relationship with God, but how can we make sure we don’t repeat the cycle and drift from God again?

It will not be easy; it could potentially be out of our control. Sometimes God allows seasons of distance to teach us dependence, but He never stops inviting us back.

What are some ways we can minimise our chances of drifting from God?

We should learn to slow down, to learn how we react to different situations and slow long enough to discern whether what we feel is fear, desire, or conviction instead of reacting instantly and emotionally. We need to replace our impulsive reactions with spiritual rhythms like taking a moment to pray before making a choice and letting God guide us.

God is our Creator. He gave us our identities, and we should reaffirm who He says we are until we are confident of it, and then we will have better judgement, and our emotions will not have such a strong hold over our decision-making. And if they do, it’s a good time to practice obedience to God by acting based on truth from the scriptures and denying our feelings because they can be deceptive.

Now we know that when we trust our feelings more than God, it’s most likely because we feel like we need to be in control, and that causes us to drift away from God. But we know how to discern if this is actually what’s happened and how to restore our relationship with Him.

Returning to God is not a single moment but a rhythm – a choice to choose truth over emotion, wisdom over impulse, and God’s voice over the noise within us. As we practice discernment, repentance, prayer, forgiveness, and worship, we build a life that is anchored to the Rock of our Salvation. We may drift, but we don’t have to stay distant. God is always ready to draw us close again.

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