40 Days of Purpose: How to be friends with God

“Friendship with God is reserved for those who reverence him.” Psalm 25:14 LB

Today, we’re starting with the key verse. It tells us that to have friendship with God, we need to reverence Him, but what does that mean?

It means to have a deep respect for God and even feel a little awe. But it also means to recognise God’s authority and submit to His will, aka a worship lifestyle.

To be God’s friend we need to respect Him, surrender to Him and love Him. Sounds so simple but we often overcomplicate it.

We may doubt that God wants to be our friend but it’s a lie we need to stop believing. We see the type of relationship God wants with us embodied in Adam and Eve in Eden. They loved each other and enjoyed spending time together as we do with our friends. That’s what God wants with us – a simple, loving relationship.

“From one man he has made every nationality to live over the whole earth and has determined their appointed times and the boundaries of where they live. He did this so that they might seek God, and perhaps they might reach out and find him, though he is not far from each one of us.” Acts 17:26-37 CSB

Our greatest privilege is knowing God knows us and understands us (Jeremiah 9:24). He is the best friend we could ever have.

There are six things we can do to be better friends with God.

CONSTANT CONVERSATION

Friendship is about living life together, living in community even from opposite sides of the world. God wants us to share life with Him. We do that by inviting Him to join us as we go through our day and by talking to Him throughout it. It’s as simple as thinking about Him or reframing our thoughts to consider Him in them. For example, when we are looking out the window we can turn our thoughts to Him by thanking Him for the things we see or for how He shaped the world. If someone comes into our mind we can pray for them in that instant.

“Be unceasing and persistent in prayer.” 1 Thessalonians 5:17 AMP

Just as with any friendship it is important to have quality time together just the two of us. That time together is as important as including Him in our activities throughout the day.

Our mindset is the key to friendship with God. The right attitude is important, we need to approach things with God in mind. This mindset is more important than what we do.

When we include God in our day we need to stay aware of His presence. Practising His presence is something that takes time and isn’t always easy.

“One God and Father of all, who is above all and through all and in all.” Ephesians 4:6 CSB

It’s easier to practise His presence when we remember God is everywhere even within us. We couldn’t be closer to Him if we tried.

We need to train our minds to focus on God and think about Him throughout the day. Choosing to pray shorter prayers can help us stay focused and if we are busy we can schedule time for them throughout the day to make sure we prioritise Him.

It’s important to remember we don’t come to God to feel better about ourselves. We do it out of love for Him. We worship Him because of who He is and our praise isn’t to make us feel good, it’s to do good. Our lifestyle of worship keeps God at the centre and is a reminder He is always there even if it doesn’t always feel like it.

CONTINUAL MEDITATION

The next thing to be a better friend to God is to meditate on His Word.

“His delight is in the Lord’s instruction, and he meditates on it day and night.” Psalm 1:2 CSB

Meditating is focused thinking so to meditate on the Word means to think about it, to reflect on it and to remember it. In Psalm 1:2 we read of David finding joy in God’s Word and meditating on it continually. Joshua 1 tells us meditating on God’s Word will help us succeed in everything, it will certainly help us succeed in being a better friend.

God’s Word reveals who He is, it shows us His character and changes us as we read (1 Samuel 3:21).

There are resources that can help us meditate on God’s Word. There are bible apps, bible verse memorisation apps, YouTube videos, and bible verse prints. Social media can help too if we follow the right accounts.

When we develop this practice of meditation, of considering the truth in our mind we may be given greater understanding by God.

So far we have learned that prayer and meditation are essential in being a friend of God. Prayer lets us speak to God and meditation lets God speak to us.

Friendship is a process, it takes desire, time and energy. Our closeness with God is our choice. If we want an intimate relationship with God like He did with Moses or Abraham then it is up to us to make it happen. God waits for us to seek Him.

BE HONEST

God isn’t looking for perfection, He knows we can’t be but He does want us to be honest. He wants us to be honest with Him about our feelings and our problems. He wants the truth, not what we want to say or think we should say.

We just need to open the bible to see the raw emotion, the doubts, fears but also the joy. The Psalms are full of it. God wants our emotion, He wants us to worship Him with passion.

“I pray to you, Lord. I beg for mercy. I tell you all my worries and my troubles, and whenever I feel low, you are there to guide me.” Psalm 142:1-2 CEV

Authenticity is what God wants. For us to be truly ourselves and hide nothing from Him. He wants our vulnerability as much as our praise.

Our greatest barrier to friendship with God is bitterness. We question why but we must learn that God always act with our best interest in mind and He can work any situation for good (Romans 8:28).

Take Naomi for example in the book of Ruth. She had lost everything, her husband and her children were all dead. She was living in a foreign land and the only one who stayed by her was her daughter-in-law Ruth. Ruth went with her back to Naomi’s hometown but that didn’t heal Naomi’s bitterness.

Naomi was angry at God for taking everything from her. But God was not done with her, her story was not yet over. By the end of the book Ruth is married and has a son, by the end Naomi is no longer bitter but filled with joy. Naomi was healed from her bitterness but it did take time. Naomi loved God again but even when she was bitter He was still working, still providing. Just like Naomi, we can learn to let go of our resentment by taking it to God and telling Him how we feel. It will take time but God will heal and restore us.

Being honest with God is the key to unlocking a deeper relationship with Him.

OBEY IN FAITH

Just as being honest with God grows our friendship with Him so does our obedience.

“And you are my friends, if you obey me.” John 15:14 CEV

Obedience deepens our relationship with God because it shows we trust Him, particularly in situations where we doubt His Word.

We obey because we love Him and trust He knows best. We follow in faith because we believe in His Word. The closer we follow Him the deeper our relationship with Him will be.

Friendship isn’t passive, we act on our feelings for those we love and obedience is our way of showing love to God.

Whether the things He asks us to do are small or big, we should be obedient. Do it without doubt or procrastination. God considers our obedience an act of worship.

God is pleased when we live obediently. He shows us through Jesus life. We know little about Jesus life between his birth and the start of his ministry but we do know he lived obediently and that this pleased God (Luke 2:51, Matthew 3:17).

“I have loved you, just as my Father has loved me. So remain faithful to my love for you. So remain faithful to my love for you. If you obey me, I will keep loving you, just as my Father keeps loving me, because I have obeyed him.” John 15:9-11 CEV

VALUE WHAT GOD VALUES

Good friends care about what is important to each other.

“My love for your house burns in me like a fire, and when others insult you, they insulted me as well.” Psalm 69:9 CEV

Paul is a splendid example of this. He no longer lives for himself. God’s plan became his plan and Paul was passionate about the things that God was passionate about.

“If I live, it will be for Christ, and if I die, I will gain even more.” Philippians 1:2 CEV

What God values most is His people. He wants to know and love them. He wants to save as many people as possible before the last day (John 6:29). To be God’s friend we must care for His people and tell them about Him so they might be saved.

DESIRE GOD’S FRIENDSHIP MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE

Lastly, to be a better friend to God we must want His friendship more than anything. He must be first in our lives, we must be willing to sacrifice things for Him.

“I ask only one thing, Lord: Let me live in your house every day of my life to see how wonderful you are and to pray in your temple.” Psalm 27:4 CEV

We are only as close to God as we choose to be. That means choosing Him is intentional. How we spend our time or focus our thoughts is intentional. To desire God more than anything is to be on fire for Him, to be filled with passion.

Jacob was so passionate about God that he wrestled Him, and God let Jacob win (Genesis 32:26). Have you been filled with such passion?

Most of us feel more pain than passion and that’s okay. Pain can be our greatest motivator, the fuel to change. It can wake us up from our spiritual slumber. We can come to God with our reality and ask for Him to restore us, to reignite our passion for Him. But if we do we must mean it.

“You seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:13 NIV

Developing a friendship with God is the most important thing we can do. But it is up to us to choose Him. God will draw near to us if we draw near to Him (James 4:8).

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